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<P>Simplicity <BR>
<P><I> Sophira F. Sipayzo</I>
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      <P align=right>[ <a href="about.html">about</a> | <a href="love.html">love</a> | <a href="quotes.html">quotes</a> | <a href="poetry.html">poetry</a> | <a href="wicca.html">wicca</a> | <a href="names.html">names</a> | <a href="keeper.html">keeperships</a> | <a href="links.html">links</a> | <a href="linkto.html">link to moi</a> ]
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<P>When it comes to ourselves we are often not able to see ourselves clearly. As a result, I have previously not had a section of Simplicity to describe myself. But in the world we live in today it is possible to find an unbiased view of ourselves through personality tests. So, I took one.
<P><a href="http://www.true.com/">TRUE</a> offers such a test. "With the only truly scientific compatibility test online, we'll measure 99 relationship factors to help you find your most compatible match." This is who I am and what I'm all about. My True Personality Report is as follows, minus the section unsuitabke for children, continued from <href="myself.html">page 1</a>.
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<FONT size=4>Money Attitudes - Summary</font>
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<BR>  You realize the importance of money but it doesn't consume your thoughts. You appear to have a healthy approach to your money situation, being financially responsible while not allowing your finances to distract you from other important aspects of your life.
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<FONT size=4>Social Life - Summary</font>
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<BR>  Certain facets of your personality may occasionally make it challenging for others to interact with you. You tend to be as happy and comfortable alone as you are with other people.  Nevertheless, your moderate level of sociability and social know-how might still be holding you back.  If you take action and perk up, people will flock to you – the kind of people you'll want to be around as much as they want to be around you.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Based on your responses, it appears that your social skills are okay, but not great.  The awkwardness of your interactions could get in the way when others are trying to get to know you.  Consider taking steps to bring your social skills to a new level, as this will undoubtedly improve your chances at finding love.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are neither an introvert nor an extrovert, but instead fall somewhere in between.  Your orientation is a balance between the inner world of ideas, emotions, and reflections and the outer world of people, activities, and socializing.  You draw your energy and motivation from both sources.  It could be said that you get the best of both worlds.  You like being with others but you also enjoy spending time alone.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>While on some days you may feel like you are on top of the world, on other days, doubts about your personal worth and abilities probably begin to creep in.  You may be held back socially by these occasional doubts.  When you begin to truly believe in yourself and your abilities you will notice that interacting with others will become much easier.  And, believe it or not, self-confidence has been shown to be a more important factor in determining someone's attractiveness than physical beauty.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are an optimistic person, often looking for the silver lining to any clouds you may encounter.  Your attitude is generally positive.  This will likely be a plus in looking for that special someone - optimism is an attractive quality in a person.  Just make sure that by putting a positive spin on everything you don't ignore real problems.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Your sense of humor appears to be balanced by a more serious side.  You are able to see the lighter side to some things, but in other situations, you fail to see any funny side. Finding the humor even in tough situations can be a key coping strategy in times of stress.  Studies have shown that laughter can actually heal both psychological and physical wounds.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Although you possess some altruistic traits, you can occasionally be self-centered or selfish.  You are more than willing to put others first at times, but sometimes you just lookout for yourself.  Being altruistic benefits not just the person you are helping, but it can also help you, so consider making the choice to be altruistic more often if you can.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>At times, you enjoy being the center of attention. There's no harm in enjoying the attention of others.  Just be sure that the people around you are getting their fair share of attention too.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You seem to prefer a balance in your life when it comes to spending time with friends and family versus spending time alone.  You don't rely on others a great deal, preferring to be somewhat more self-sufficient.  While you miss the important people in your life when they aren't around, the time you spend alone contributes to your happiness as much as the time you spend in the company of others.  Each lends richness to your life.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR>  Having a social network is somewhat important to you. Although you seem to appreciate the connections you have with your friends and family, you are not very reliant upon them.  While you are aware of the importance of friends and family, you don't think that you truly need them.  This is perfectly fine, as long as you don't overwhelm your partner by relying solely on him/her for your emotional needs.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Although you seem to appreciate the connections you have with your friends and family, you are not very reliant upon them.  While you are aware of the importance of friends and family, you don't think that you truly need them.  This is perfectly fine, as long as you don't overwhelm your partner by relying solely on him/her for your emotional needs.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are neither an introvert nor an extrovert - you fall somewhere in between the two extremes.  This likely means that although you would be relatively at ease in large groups, you don't mind spending time on your own.  Your social network likely reflects this.</BLOCKQUOTE>
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<FONT size=4>Stress Reaction - Summary</font>
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<BR>  It appears that your understanding of your own emotions and those of others is average. Emotional intelligence is a set of skills that help us to deal with our emotions.  It includes the ability to recognize our feelings and needs for what they really are (ex.  realize that we are "feeling rejected", rather than simply "upset") as well as the ability to regulate them (console ourselves when we are feeling sad, or control our anger).  Part of emotional intelligence is the ease with which we cope with emotions in others, and how well we can reconcile our immediate desires without long-term goals and the needs of other people.   Your emotional IQ is average.  You're able to recognize and deal with your own emotions and those of others in a reasonably effective manner.  This is likely evident in your ability to relate to others, express your needs, and maintain a satisfactory level of emotional health.  Since your score is in the mid-range, however, you are not taking full advantage of your potential. Improving your emotional IQ will bring numerous benefits, including stronger relationships, a more successful career, and better emotional health.  Most of all, you will be an all-around happier person.
<BR>  In general, your reaction to stress is somewhat adaptive. You appear to have fairly good coping skills, and as a result, you generally react well to stress.  You could, however, benefit from working on this area because your coping skills may at times let you down.
<BR>  You display a few psychological traits that may interfere with your day-to-day functioning. You have overall strength of character, but some mishaps are difficult for you to deal with.  You are generally able to adapt and to keep things in perspective.  This makes you a good partner in that you rarely take things personally when your loved one has strong reactions or difficulty coping.  You try to subscribe to the philosophy of "this, too, shall pass," but it does elude you occasionally – especially if the situation holds particular significance for you.  Remember that anything can happen, and that it doesn't have to be a tragedy or triumph.  Remember that each person's reality is different from yours – do not make others feel ashamed or embarrassed for their reactions to events that may not faze you to the same degree.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You appear to have fairly good coping skills.  This means that you handle some negative events well, but others might knock you down.  You would be well served to work on handling those particular stressors.  As you become more adept in this area, you will feel more at ease knowing that you can handle whatever the world throws at you.  Improving your coping skills will have a positive impact on your relationships, because you won't burden others during times of stress.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>According to this test, you sometimes have trouble controlling your emotions.  Although there is nothing wrong with being emotional, it can sometimes put your partner in a difficult position, especially if s/he has trouble dealing with emotional people.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You could stand to work on loving yourself unconditionally.  You have probably noticed that it is so much harder to face the world during those times when you don't feel good about yourself.  Working on boosting your confidence in yourself and your abilities will do you so much good - and as a bonus will make you an easier person to be around.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Your attitude is generally positive and optimistic, which likely makes you a pleasure to be around.  Instead of expecting a negative outcome, you tend to expect the best.  Your optimism is likely one of your strengths, and helps you overcome difficult situations.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You seem to need quite a bit of reassurance that your partner cares about you when you are in a relationship.  This likely happens most often when you are having a rough day or when insecurity begins to creep in.  Just remember that needing lots of reassurance can be quite a drain on relationships.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are very comfortable expressing your emotions.  This is great, because expressing what you feel, in terms of both positive and negative emotions, is essential to successful relationships.</BLOCKQUOTE>
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<FONT size=4>Communication Style - Summary</font>
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<BR>  You are somewhat comfortable being vulnerable to your romantic partner. You are fairly comfortable opening up and letting yourself be vulnerable to your romantic partner, but you tend to proceed with caution.  Sometimes you steer clear of situations could allow others to take advantage of you or harm you in some way.  As a result, you may require some time to get close to people and let your guard down.  It can payoff to be a bit cautious when dealing with others in this world.  You seem to have found the balance between experiencing the rewards that can come from risk-taking, and calculating the potential repercussions of being completely unguarded.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are not particularly fazed when people become emotional around you - although you are not completely comfortable with it either.  You might have trouble being with someone who is extremely emotional - so perhaps working on this ability would be a useful relationship skill to learn.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>In general, you seem to be very willing to rely on others.  This is great because it indicates that you are able to seek support when you need it.   You seem to realize that opening up to asking for help can improve your chances of finding a partner in life - relying on someone allows him/her to feel that they make a difference in your life.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You seem to be somewhat guarded when it comes to trusting other people.  This is perhaps wise when you are just getting to know others.  While allowing others to earn some of your trust (rather than blindly trusting them) is a good idea when it comes to dating, be careful that you don't take it too far.  Others may become defensive if they perceive that you doubt their intentions.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR>  You need some emotional intimacy. You need some emotional closeness and intimacy with your romantic partners, but not a lot.  Check in with future partners to make sure that they are getting the amount of intimacy that they need.  Perhaps you are missing out on one of the greatest aspects of love - the emotional closeness that can develop between people who care about each other.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You occasionally have difficulty accepting that your partner may have different opinions than you do.  Just letting things go, and accepting that you cannot change your partner's every opinion, is an important relationship skill to learn.  It's perfectly OK to feel strongly about certain things.   However, forcing others to accept your views can rub them the wrong way, and they may perceive you as pushy.  Try to be more open - you may learn to see things from a different angle.  Besides, wouldn't life be boring if we all shared exactly the same views?</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>In certain circumstances, you are willing to support your partner even when you have different goals.  This may not always be the case though, especially when your partner's goals are extremely different from your own.  Keep in mind that lending your partner reinforcement in reaching his/her goals is very important in a relationship. At times when you are being less supportive, the lack of encouragement may leave your mate feeling as though your affection is conditional - that you will like him/her only as long as s/he aligns his/her goals with yours. Consider being more unconditionally open to accepting your partner's aspirations for his/her sake - and the sake of your relationship.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are someone who doesn't mind dealing with moodiness in others - but this doesn't mean that you particularly enjoy it.  You would probably find it easier to be with someone who finds it easy to control his/her emotions, but if ‘the one' turns out to be frequently on an emotional roller coaster, you could handle it.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>While you are open to input from others, when you feel strongly about an issue, you tend to be less open-minded.  There's nothing wrong with sticking to your guns when you feel strongly about something.  Be sure though, that you don't close the door on your partner's ideas.</BLOCKQUOTE>
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<BR>  You are somewhat open to accepting your partner's opinions, goals, and input in the relationship. You have the ability to communicate with other people effectively – but your skills could use some work.  You sometimes experience difficulty getting your point across clearly and tactfully.  People probably find it somewhat tricky to interact with you, especially when you are nervous or the stakes are high.  Building up your communication skills would benefit you highly – you will feel more self-confident and you will witness your relationships getting better and better.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Although your communication skills are not bad, they definitely could use some improvement.  You could work on getting your message across in a clear, concise, and sensitive manner while still listening and actually "hearing" what others have to say.  This is an important skill in relationships.  In fact, it has been proven that it leads to success in a relationship.  Improving these skills could really increase your chances of developing successful relationships - in your romantic life, with friends, or in the workplace.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>From your results, it appears that although you are usually tactful, you do sometimes put your foot in your mouth, so to speak, when dealing with others.    Sensitivity is key to relationships of all kinds, especially of the romantic type.  You might want to work on trying to avoid saying hurtful things - because even if you only do so rarely, it may still make an impression on others.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR>  You communicate somewhat effectively and considerately with other people  
<BR>  You have a moderate need for intellectual, thought-provoking discussions with partner. You sometimes like to discuss intellectual issues.  At other times, however, you would prefer to limit conversation to lighter topics.  This means that you are probably comfortable dealing with a range of different conversation topics.  You don't come across as pretentious, but you are capable of carrying on intelligent conversation –this is great.
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<FONT size=4>Conflict Resolution - Summary</font>
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<BR>  You have relatively strong conflict resolution skills. You should work to improve your conflict resolution skills.  You will find it even easier to handle any situation that involves differences of opinion with others – no matter how serious – if you improve in this area.   As a bonus, you'll also notice that conflict situations will happen less frequently as a result.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Your occasional intolerance of other people may mean that you are sometimes unwilling to compromise.  You may believe that your opinion is more valid than the opinions of others.  Once you realize that you are not the only person who could be right, and become more tolerant of others - even when they are imperfect - your ability to resolve conflict will improve a great deal.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You seem to be relatively assertive.  However, you may still want to work on how you make your wants and needs known to others.  Standing up for yourself is not pushy, as long as you make sure to factor in the needs of others.   Remember that being assertive in conflict situations will help you get what you want from others.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>On occasion, you have difficulty accepting or adjusting to changed plans, new ideas, or strange situations; at other times you are better able to cope.  Flexibility allows for compromise in relationships, with both parties having their needs met as much as possible. Your ability to resolve conflict may be hindered at times by your unbending mindset.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR>  You are somewhat prone to conflict. You appear to be prone to conflict situations on occasion.  Try to keep an open mind at all times and look at a potential problem in several different ways before moving forward.  It is important to remember that we are all human and that people make mistakes.  Ask yourself seriously whether a situation is worth getting upset about before you put your foot down or attempt to control the outcome.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>On occasion, you find it difficult to accept other people's flaws and mistakes.  Watch that you don't let little annoyances get the best of you!  Being critical and disapproving can make your partners feel insecure because they can sense your disapproval even if you don't voice it.  It can also interfere with your own happiness as well. If you look for flaws in those around you, you could miss out on many of their good traits.  Learning to tolerate others' quirks will increase your pool of potential partners significantly.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You occasionally have difficulty accepting or adjusting to changed plans, new ideas, or strange situations, while other times you are better able to cope.  You would be wise to become more reliably accommodating, as inflexibility can make you more vulnerable to conflict with others.   You may experience relationship trouble unless your partner is more consistently flexible than you are.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>When something is important to you, you try to assert control over that area.  When something isn't as vital to you, however, you are more willing to let others take charge.  While this may make for some arguments when you encounter resistance on those matters that are close to your heart, at least the conflict happens because you feel strongly about that issue.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You are generally able to control your anger effectively, but if something really gets to you then you get angry.  You don't bottle it up.  This is perfectly normal, since some anger is acceptable.  After all, anger can help encourage you to stand up for yourself.  Just be sure that the anger you experience does not lead you to lash out at others verbally or physically.  Talk it out instead.</BLOCKQUOTE>
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<FONT size=4>Relationship Issues - Summary</font>
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<BR>  You appear to be almost ready to commit to a serious, long-term relationship. You appear to be relatively ready for a committed relationship.  Your life and your emotional state are nearly optimal for meeting the right person.  Don't worry - very few people are 100% prepared to take the plunge before they meet their soulmate.  When the right person comes along, you will have no problem taking that step forward.
<BR>  You're looking for a long-term relationship. You seem to be looking for lasting love when it comes to finding a mate.  While it's great to know exactly what you want, be sure not to set yourself up for disappointment with unrealistic expectations.  Most importantly, make your intentions absolutely clear to anyone who you date. It's only fair that you both know where you stand at all stages of the dating game.
<BR>  Generally, you believe romance should be preserved for special occasions. You have a tendency to reserve romance for special occasions.  It's not that you think that it's unimportant; you just don't believe that it needs to be a part of everyday life.  Perhaps future partners might appreciate it if you changed your mindset just a little.  It's not that romance needs to be excessive, but a few kind words, or a romantic gesture or two, even on "regular" days, can go a long way and improve your relationship satisfaction.
<BR>  You are somewhat attentive towards your romantic partner. You appear to be somewhat attentive to your partner when in a relationship.  Try checking in with him/her even more frequently to make sure that his/her needs are met and that s/he is happy in the relationship and you will be well on your way to a great relationship.  You are already aware that making sure your own needs aren't being ignored is important as well.  Good on you!
<BR>  You don't mind some forms of chivalry. You apparently need a man to dote on you a fair amount in order to win your respect – and your heart.  Times have changed, and you seem to be aware of the fact that just because someone is only willing to go so far in terms of taking care of you it doesn't mean he's not a great catch.   Men have practically been "trained" to curb their chivalrous behaviors, lest they offend a woman who simply won't have any of it.
<BR>  You have modern gender role beliefs. You tend to have very modern attitudes when it comes to the roles of men and women in romantic relationships.  Being somewhat flexible regarding your more progressive beliefs may make it easier to find a mate, since not everyone is quite as evolved as you seem to be.
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<FONT size=4>Attachment Style - Summary</font>
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<BR>  Your level of reliance on your partner is occasionally unhealthy. Your attachment style is healthy overall with some unhealthy tendencies, which have the potential to leave your romantic partners feeling smothered or inadequate.  It may be wise to examine your attachment style and make changes where necessary, in order to achieve a healthy relationship.
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You seem to believe in finding a healthy balance between being dependent on a partner and being independent.  While you don't want to rely on your partner too heavily, you realize the value of leaning on him/her when you need support.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You appear to become jealous occasionally, but when it occurs, it is mostly when it is merited by your partner's behavior.   This means that while your partner's spending time with people of the opposite sex won't likely bother you, you might be concerned if any doubts of fidelity come up.  This is perfectly understandable, but be sure to keep a grip on your concerns unless you have absolute proof that your partner is being unfaithful.  If you have worries, talk about them in a calm, non-accusatory manner.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>It seems that when you are in a relationship, you prefer to spend almost all of your time with your partner. This is fine if you both share this mindset, but if your partner needs sometime to pursue his/her own interests, it is important to support him/her.  If not, s/he may begin to resent your demands on his/her time.  Plus, you may need to pursue your own interests too!</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You tend to doubt your partner's feelings for you when you are in a relationship, frequently needing reassurance that s/he truly cares about you.  Try to put yourself in his/her shoes when you are feeling insecure and remember that it can get exhausting to constantly be trying to prove your love for someone.  Be sensitive to this to ensure that your recurring doubts do not negatively affect your relationship.  If the reason for this insecurity lies in your past experience, you may need to work on getting over it and learning to trust again.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>Although you do enjoy some time apart, you do not seem to want to spend too much time cultivating and maintaining friendships outside of your romantic relationship or spending time with your acquaintances.  A lack of friendships outside of your relationship can be disastrous should the relationship end.  You would have to create a new social network for yourself and make new friends.  It may also put unnecessary pressure on your partner, since he or she will be your only emotional support and social life.  Having separate friendships can be very healthy for relationships.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>While you are in a relationship, you prefer a balance between spending time alone together and socializing with others as a couple.  This is great, as having outside friendships can enrich your relationship as a whole.  Hanging out with other people can spice up a couple's life, provide conversation topics and excitement, and fulfill social needs while spending time together.  By the same token, you make sure to reserve enough alone time in your busy schedule for you as a couple.</BLOCKQUOTE>
<BR><BLOCKQUOTE>You appear to be very open in your life when it comes to your belongings and physical space.  You do not seem to someone concerned about privacy.   Whether you grew up in a home where sharing was strongly encouraged, or you prefer not to keep secrets from your romantic partner, there seem to be very few things that you would prefer that your partner did not know about.  This is great because your partner will know that you are completely open with him/her.  On the other hand, a little bit of mystery doesn't hurt - so why don't you indulge yourself on occasion?</BLOCKQUOTE>
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<FONT size=4>Parenting Style - Summary</font>
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<BR>  You believe in providing children with a lot of affection. You believe it is important to provide children with a lot of affection as they are growing up.  A parenting style that includes providing a lot of affection (along with setting firm limits) has been proven to contribute to the raising of happy and productive adults.  Your natural inclination seems to be right on the ball – children need affection to thrive emotionally.
<BR>  You don't believe in providing children with a lot of limits. You believe it is not necessary to provide children with limits as they are growing up.  It has actually been found that children require rules and structure in order to grow up to be well adjusted adults.  Even if you are uncomfortable with the idea of disciplining your children, make an effort – they will be better equipped for challenges later in life.
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