Simplicity
Sophira F. Sipayzo
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When it comes to ourselves we are often not able to see ourselves clearly. As a result, I have previously not had a section of Simplicity to describe myself. But in the world we live in today it is possible to find an unbiased view of ourselves through personality tests. So, I took one. TRUE offers such a test. "With the only truly scientific compatibility test online, we'll measure 99 relationship factors to help you find your most compatible match." This is who I am and what I'm all about. My True Personality Report is as follows, minus the section unsuitabke for children, continued from
Money Attitudes - Summary
Social Life - Summary
Stress Reaction - Summary
You appear to have fairly good coping skills. This means that you handle some negative events well, but others might knock you down. You would be well served to work on handling those particular stressors. As you become more adept in this area, you will feel more at ease knowing that you can handle whatever the world throws at you. Improving your coping skills will have a positive impact on your relationships, because you won't burden others during times of stress. According to this test, you sometimes have trouble controlling your emotions. Although there is nothing wrong with being emotional, it can sometimes put your partner in a difficult position, especially if s/he has trouble dealing with emotional people. You could stand to work on loving yourself unconditionally. You have probably noticed that it is so much harder to face the world during those times when you don't feel good about yourself. Working on boosting your confidence in yourself and your abilities will do you so much good - and as a bonus will make you an easier person to be around. Your attitude is generally positive and optimistic, which likely makes you a pleasure to be around. Instead of expecting a negative outcome, you tend to expect the best. Your optimism is likely one of your strengths, and helps you overcome difficult situations. You seem to need quite a bit of reassurance that your partner cares about you when you are in a relationship. This likely happens most often when you are having a rough day or when insecurity begins to creep in. Just remember that needing lots of reassurance can be quite a drain on relationships. You are very comfortable expressing your emotions. This is great, because expressing what you feel, in terms of both positive and negative emotions, is essential to successful relationships. Communication Style - Summary
You are not particularly fazed when people become emotional around you - although you are not completely comfortable with it either. You might have trouble being with someone who is extremely emotional - so perhaps working on this ability would be a useful relationship skill to learn. In general, you seem to be very willing to rely on others. This is great because it indicates that you are able to seek support when you need it. You seem to realize that opening up to asking for help can improve your chances of finding a partner in life - relying on someone allows him/her to feel that they make a difference in your life. You seem to be somewhat guarded when it comes to trusting other people. This is perhaps wise when you are just getting to know others. While allowing others to earn some of your trust (rather than blindly trusting them) is a good idea when it comes to dating, be careful that you don't take it too far. Others may become defensive if they perceive that you doubt their intentions. You need some emotional intimacy. You need some emotional closeness and intimacy with your romantic partners, but not a lot. Check in with future partners to make sure that they are getting the amount of intimacy that they need. Perhaps you are missing out on one of the greatest aspects of love - the emotional closeness that can develop between people who care about each other. You occasionally have difficulty accepting that your partner may have different opinions than you do. Just letting things go, and accepting that you cannot change your partner's every opinion, is an important relationship skill to learn. It's perfectly OK to feel strongly about certain things. However, forcing others to accept your views can rub them the wrong way, and they may perceive you as pushy. Try to be more open - you may learn to see things from a different angle. Besides, wouldn't life be boring if we all shared exactly the same views? In certain circumstances, you are willing to support your partner even when you have different goals. This may not always be the case though, especially when your partner's goals are extremely different from your own. Keep in mind that lending your partner reinforcement in reaching his/her goals is very important in a relationship. At times when you are being less supportive, the lack of encouragement may leave your mate feeling as though your affection is conditional - that you will like him/her only as long as s/he aligns his/her goals with yours. Consider being more unconditionally open to accepting your partner's aspirations for his/her sake - and the sake of your relationship. You are someone who doesn't mind dealing with moodiness in others - but this doesn't mean that you particularly enjoy it. You would probably find it easier to be with someone who finds it easy to control his/her emotions, but if the one' turns out to be frequently on an emotional roller coaster, you could handle it. While you are open to input from others, when you feel strongly about an issue, you tend to be less open-minded. There's nothing wrong with sticking to your guns when you feel strongly about something. Be sure though, that you don't close the door on your partner's ideas. You are somewhat open to accepting your partner's opinions, goals, and input in the relationship. You have the ability to communicate with other people effectively but your skills could use some work. You sometimes experience difficulty getting your point across clearly and tactfully. People probably find it somewhat tricky to interact with you, especially when you are nervous or the stakes are high. Building up your communication skills would benefit you highly you will feel more self-confident and you will witness your relationships getting better and better. Although your communication skills are not bad, they definitely could use some improvement. You could work on getting your message across in a clear, concise, and sensitive manner while still listening and actually "hearing" what others have to say. This is an important skill in relationships. In fact, it has been proven that it leads to success in a relationship. Improving these skills could really increase your chances of developing successful relationships - in your romantic life, with friends, or in the workplace. From your results, it appears that although you are usually tactful, you do sometimes put your foot in your mouth, so to speak, when dealing with others. Sensitivity is key to relationships of all kinds, especially of the romantic type. You might want to work on trying to avoid saying hurtful things - because even if you only do so rarely, it may still make an impression on others. You communicate somewhat effectively and considerately with other people You have a moderate need for intellectual, thought-provoking discussions with partner. You sometimes like to discuss intellectual issues. At other times, however, you would prefer to limit conversation to lighter topics. This means that you are probably comfortable dealing with a range of different conversation topics. You don't come across as pretentious, but you are capable of carrying on intelligent conversation this is great. Conflict Resolution - Summary
Your occasional intolerance of other people may mean that you are sometimes unwilling to compromise. You may believe that your opinion is more valid than the opinions of others. Once you realize that you are not the only person who could be right, and become more tolerant of others - even when they are imperfect - your ability to resolve conflict will improve a great deal. You seem to be relatively assertive. However, you may still want to work on how you make your wants and needs known to others. Standing up for yourself is not pushy, as long as you make sure to factor in the needs of others. Remember that being assertive in conflict situations will help you get what you want from others. On occasion, you have difficulty accepting or adjusting to changed plans, new ideas, or strange situations; at other times you are better able to cope. Flexibility allows for compromise in relationships, with both parties having their needs met as much as possible. Your ability to resolve conflict may be hindered at times by your unbending mindset. You are somewhat prone to conflict. You appear to be prone to conflict situations on occasion. Try to keep an open mind at all times and look at a potential problem in several different ways before moving forward. It is important to remember that we are all human and that people make mistakes. Ask yourself seriously whether a situation is worth getting upset about before you put your foot down or attempt to control the outcome. On occasion, you find it difficult to accept other people's flaws and mistakes. Watch that you don't let little annoyances get the best of you! Being critical and disapproving can make your partners feel insecure because they can sense your disapproval even if you don't voice it. It can also interfere with your own happiness as well. If you look for flaws in those around you, you could miss out on many of their good traits. Learning to tolerate others' quirks will increase your pool of potential partners significantly. You occasionally have difficulty accepting or adjusting to changed plans, new ideas, or strange situations, while other times you are better able to cope. You would be wise to become more reliably accommodating, as inflexibility can make you more vulnerable to conflict with others. You may experience relationship trouble unless your partner is more consistently flexible than you are. When something is important to you, you try to assert control over that area. When something isn't as vital to you, however, you are more willing to let others take charge. While this may make for some arguments when you encounter resistance on those matters that are close to your heart, at least the conflict happens because you feel strongly about that issue. You are generally able to control your anger effectively, but if something really gets to you then you get angry. You don't bottle it up. This is perfectly normal, since some anger is acceptable. After all, anger can help encourage you to stand up for yourself. Just be sure that the anger you experience does not lead you to lash out at others verbally or physically. Talk it out instead. Relationship Issues - Summary
Attachment Style - Summary
You seem to believe in finding a healthy balance between being dependent on a partner and being independent. While you don't want to rely on your partner too heavily, you realize the value of leaning on him/her when you need support. You appear to become jealous occasionally, but when it occurs, it is mostly when it is merited by your partner's behavior. This means that while your partner's spending time with people of the opposite sex won't likely bother you, you might be concerned if any doubts of fidelity come up. This is perfectly understandable, but be sure to keep a grip on your concerns unless you have absolute proof that your partner is being unfaithful. If you have worries, talk about them in a calm, non-accusatory manner. It seems that when you are in a relationship, you prefer to spend almost all of your time with your partner. This is fine if you both share this mindset, but if your partner needs sometime to pursue his/her own interests, it is important to support him/her. If not, s/he may begin to resent your demands on his/her time. Plus, you may need to pursue your own interests too! You tend to doubt your partner's feelings for you when you are in a relationship, frequently needing reassurance that s/he truly cares about you. Try to put yourself in his/her shoes when you are feeling insecure and remember that it can get exhausting to constantly be trying to prove your love for someone. Be sensitive to this to ensure that your recurring doubts do not negatively affect your relationship. If the reason for this insecurity lies in your past experience, you may need to work on getting over it and learning to trust again. Although you do enjoy some time apart, you do not seem to want to spend too much time cultivating and maintaining friendships outside of your romantic relationship or spending time with your acquaintances. A lack of friendships outside of your relationship can be disastrous should the relationship end. You would have to create a new social network for yourself and make new friends. It may also put unnecessary pressure on your partner, since he or she will be your only emotional support and social life. Having separate friendships can be very healthy for relationships. While you are in a relationship, you prefer a balance between spending time alone together and socializing with others as a couple. This is great, as having outside friendships can enrich your relationship as a whole. Hanging out with other people can spice up a couple's life, provide conversation topics and excitement, and fulfill social needs while spending time together. By the same token, you make sure to reserve enough alone time in your busy schedule for you as a couple. You appear to be very open in your life when it comes to your belongings and physical space. You do not seem to someone concerned about privacy. Whether you grew up in a home where sharing was strongly encouraged, or you prefer not to keep secrets from your romantic partner, there seem to be very few things that you would prefer that your partner did not know about. This is great because your partner will know that you are completely open with him/her. On the other hand, a little bit of mystery doesn't hurt - so why don't you indulge yourself on occasion? Parenting Style - Summary
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